Paul and Rick crack open the top books on leadership and life on the Breaking Average Podcast.

For this week's episode the book in the spotlight is "The Charisma Myth" written by Olivia Fox Cabane.   You don't want to mis this podcast. 

I wanted to share some thoughts regarding the topics of obstacles.  I did this a few years back, but recently transcribed the video.

Here's both.

 Here's the transcript for the video above. (sorry for the typos)

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Hey guys, hope you're doing good.

March the fourth -- fantastic day in my family at least, oldest son's birthday today. So hey, listen, I wanted to throw down some thoughts on walking the dog again, dogs plural. just rode the bike. And I was thinking about obstacles.

How many times have you been stopped by obstacles? I mean, I have 1000s of times. I've had obstacles today. I've let the obstacles rob me of my next steps, to be honest with you. But I've also found ways to leverage and get past it right. You've heard the phrase, the obstacle is the way, here's something that happened to me, I realized I was dealing with some obstacles. And I was actually the obstacles or external obstacles are internal. Okay.

I always make an excuses as to why I wasn't gonna get...

One of my favorite movie scenes is this clip from the movie Rudy.  I love how the players and fans rally to influence the coach to put Rudy in the game.  And I love how he leads with heart and tenacity.  It's how we should all live.

If you are a fan of leadership, then you ought to be a fan of football. Seriously!  While football may just be a game to most, there are many parallels to what it takes to live and lead effectively at home and in business;  especially college or playoff football. Football at that level reflects all the critical elements of leadership.  Consider you can find many of John Maxwell's 21 Laws of Leadership exemplified in a top 20 or playoff football team.  You'll see the law of the lid, the law of momentum, the law of teamwork, and so many more.

For many, the best part of football on the calendar is not just the Super Bowl, but college bowl games and the playoffs for the teams trying to go...

For as he thinks in his heart, so is he

– Proverbs 23:7

I've previously shared about the importance of “being transformed by the renewing of your mind.”   This effort is not a “one in a done” exercise. It takes a daily commitment.  The key is to eliminate our misbeliefs and unfounded self-limitations -- and instead think the truth.

One of the things that helps me the most is to create a set of “I am” statements.  These are statements about myself, founded on biblical truths.  These are affirmations.  Here are a few straight from the Word that you can use about you. It's scriptural truth — what God thinks about you — which is the most powerful truth there is.

1. I am a child of God, and He is with me. – Galatians 4:6
2. I am a citizen of heaven - Philippians 3:20
3. I am a leader of others – 2 Timothy 2:2
4. I am a new creation - 2 Corinthians 5:17
5. I am a prophetic...

Heath Ledger, playing the role of the villainous Joker in the Batman series, had a famous line that often causes me to rethink.

Why so Serious?

It’s a great question to ponder. Admittedly, I sometimes get way too serious in my work and in life.  That serious bit, causes me to stress more, live less, and miss out on great experiences and relationships. I often realize later – usually after the moment – that I missed an opportunity to really connect and be present. 

So, what’s the antidote going forward. Well, there’s a short little anagram, which is just a fancy word for acrostic, to home in on embracing fun daily. As you can guess, it spells the word FUN. Each letter means something specific.

Be Focused

Focus – the right focus – will keep you out of trouble. Focus means to be fully present. To be aware of what’s happening in the present. Not the past. Not the future. But right now!

Focus means being attentive and motivated...

What if you lived life like you were training for the Olympics? What would you do different? 

That’s the question I asked myself that stopped me in my tracks.

I realized I wasn’t playing full out. Yes, there are days I’m giving everything I have – and I’m leaving it out on the field wherever I am present, but there are many days that I just don’t’ have it. There are days I just don’t give it my best and I fail to FOCUS.

Why?

It’s not because of a lack of intent. I want to play full out. My aspirations are there. The reason why I don’t FINISH is because I can get out of balance.

The balance revelation drew my attention to something called the Eight Dimensions of Wellness. Maybe you have heard of them.  Here's a hokie graphic that illustrates them.  (thanks Adobe Stock)

Here are the 8 in no particular order. Each of them have an equal weight of importance and value.

1. Occupational
2. Social
3. Emotional
4. ...

“Only those who will risk going too far can possibly find out how far one can go”
— T. S. Eliot

We just launched  a new three part series on Resilience on the Breaking Average Podcast.  Have you seen it? The first episode aired recently centers on the concept of Acknowledging the Threats.  The next episodes take it even further.  This is such a powerful principle.  Resilience is a secret untapped strength each of us have, we often just don't know it.

There's an old line from the legendary Japanese Military Strategist that sets the table.

Know thyself, know thy enemy. A thousand battles, a thousand victories.

What he's saying is spot on.  You can't be yourself and face your challenges until you know yourself.  That's where it starts.  But that's not enough.  He's also saying you can't face the enemy and defeat the enemy without knowing the enemy.  Both are vital.

There are some battles...

There is a great scene early in the movie Remember the Titans where two teammates are in a huge disagreement. Gerry Bertier, the captain and star linebacker, who is white, is arguing one point with his teammate Julius Campbell, another talented linebacker, who happens to be black. Bertier is pressuring Julius to step up his game. 

Julius counters with a different perspective reflecting on the clear lack of hustle between whites and blacks on their team.  Because of the dysfunction, Julius openly wonders why he should care for anybody other than himself.  In response, Bertier tells Julius, "That's the worst attitude I have ever heard."  It's in that moment, you wonder if Julius is going to clock Bertier, but Julius responds candidly and calmly putting the pressure back on Bertier.  "Attitude Reflects Leadership, Captain."  Bertier is left standing there with no words. It's as if he got hit by a...

Let's face it.  Life comes at has hard.  How we handle those challenges reflects our character.  None of us are perfect though.  They are times in our life where we feel the  pressure.  We struggle. It's inevitable.

The good news is that there's a way around it.  There are some tricks of the trade that we can leverage to overcome the emotional hit -- at least minimize it.  I call it Emotional Retelligence.  It's about retelling - essentially hacking -- your emotional state realtime.  It's powerful! Here it is in a nutshell. 

#1 - Acknowledge the Emotion.   Admit what you're feeling.  Don't deny it.  Let's say you are planning a big event, and that sense of overwhelm just hits you hard.  In that moment, admit to yourself what you are feeling. It might be something like,

• "man, I'm feeling little anxious about this"
• "no lie, I'm worried about this won't go well"
• "I have no idea how I'm ever going...